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Home > Yes, WE live in paradise, but...Elsewhere... > Toronto, environs, Ottawa & the Ontario Outback > Tee-Zero: Toronto-centricity and the Antipathy it Invites
Toronto as the centre of the f*cking universe; why everyone else in Canada hates Toronto and Torontonians. THEY call it "Tee-Oh." WE call it "Tee-Zero." Don't like it? Oh, boo-HOO!

Primary Sites:
'Purveyors of vibe' keep the A-list crowd on the move *
'It's all about being on the right hang at the right time," says Suzanne Boyd, the glamazon editor of Flare, who is pretty much at the top of every restaurant, club and party A-list in Toronto. "On the hang" is Ms. Boyd's latest way of describing a great night out. [More]

A U.S. epidemic *
The U.S. Center for Disease Control is reporting that as of Aug. 26, there are 1,355 reported human cases of West Nile Virus in the United States, with 19 deaths reported. Why are the media not warning Canadians about travel to the United States? [More]

Already with the Whining and Sour-Grapes: 'Toronto's hopes dashed' *
The Vancouver win put a fatal spike into the prospects of Toronto's bidding for the 2012 Summer Games. [More]

Banks donate to the arts…in Tee-Zero, of course *
It was raining money yesterday in Toronto as two of the country's largest banks announced they were giving a total of almost $8-million to five major cultural institutions based in the Ontario capital. [More]

Big whooping deal: Telus gives $10-million to name music conservatory in Tee-Zero. *
...And what about the West, where you built your business, Mr. Entwhistle? Na-da, of course. [More]

Blackout: Where were you when the lights went out? *
The history of lighting is the history of urban life itself. So when it's hit by the most widespread blackout ever, what does the city become? IAN BROWN went into the streets of Toronto to find everyone exploring the darkness, in all of its danger and freedom (evalu8.org editor's note: We don't know about YOU, Ian, old pal, but we were safe and sound on the Best Coast) [More]

But enough about you, Vancouver *
Let's talk about Toronto. And let's be honest. Vancouver is the better city, at the moment. You really think the way Toronto handled SARS looks good on us? [More]

CHUM apologizes for Conan sketch *
A TV comedy sketch in which a grouchy puppet took potshots at French Canadians was called unacceptable and racist garbage by some federal politicians Friday. [More]

CHUM heads West to give some boom-boom TV *
Attention people of Calgary, Edmonton, Winnipeg and Brandon. Brace yourselves. The CITY-slickers are coming to your town. [More]

Conan gets creative with his Canadian invasion *
The comedian tells SIMON HOUPT of his plans to bring along high crime, George W. Bush and a pinch of saffron. [More]

Federal assistance sought by Toronto group -- but what about the rest of Canada? *
United group meets with MPs over complex. [More]

Fund aims to match talent with opportunity *
Toronto 1, a new soon-to-launch TV station, unveiled two production funds yesterday, totalling almost $15-million, one of which is available strictly to "producers of colour." [More]

Giving good airport *
As anyone who has followed glossy-image merchant Bonnie Fuller from Us to the National Enquirer knows, the red carpet has gone big box. Paparazzi shots of Meg Ryan shopping at Ralph's or Nicole Kidman swigging a Starbucks have as much currency as portraits of them be-gowned and be-jewelled strutting into a movie premiere. [More]

Greg Gatenby's departure -- Please don't have a nice day *
'Brilliant Canadian, not as nice as some," was the essence of the reaction to the departure of Greg Gatenby, the founder and director of Canada's best literary festival. [More]

Hollywood North(east): So far, rumour spreads faster than SARS *
Gossip and rumour are in high circulation these days in "Hollywood North," but there seems precious little fact about the impact of SARS on Toronto's $3-billion film and TV industry. [More]

I think it has a double life, Toronto *
Gay marriage, legal pot, strip clubs -- we've finally got Hollywood's attention [More]

Montreal fest unveils line-up of 439 films *
With its contentious new position on the calendar of film festivals, Montreal's annual celebration of world cinema now overlaps Toronto's festival by four days -- and Venice's by several. [More]

Moses's long goodbye *
CITY-TV founder Znaimer's farewell was so great it will be reprised -- and televised. [More]

O'Brien aftershocks reverberate in U.S. media *
Nearly a week after U.S. talk-show host Conan O'Brien stumbled into a Canadian political controversy, the aftershocks are finally hitting the American media. [More]

Odes to a city under siege *
A swing mounted between two brick buildings, a Peggy Lee song, and dance volunteers at Bay and Bloor are all enlisted in this show where Toronto plays the psychotope, SARAH MILROY writes (no wonder we call it "Tee-Zero") [More]

Ottawa, chill out, you're just jealous *
Distressing news from the hinterland arrives when the valet brings the morning post with my toast and marmalade: more Toronto Maple Leafs envy from the lesser orders. [More]

Poo-poohing the Conan show *
Mike Myers told a poo joke. That much I remember. The rest is kind of hazy and has to be pieced together. [More]

Shelter from the swarm *
Galen Weston Jr. is creating a brand-new hot spot where Toronto's most fabulously interesting people can hobnob away from the irksome masses, writes GAYLE MacDONALD [More]

Smoking ban forces family strategy *
Was Toronto, like, the last place on the planet to deny smokers in restaurants? So, like, how come they're acting like they invented it, eh? (PS: Boo-HOO!) [More]

Spielberg to transform Montreal into Paris *
The City of Montreal's film bureau has confirmed that Oscar-winning American director Steven Spielberg will be shooting a segment of his latest project, titled Terminal, at one of the city's airports, Mirabel. [More]

Stars rise on Toronto's Sunset Strip *
It's hardly swanky, REBECCA CALDWELL writes, but the Delta Chelsea hotel is getting ready to play host to Hollywood's elite [More]

The beauty beneath Canada's ugliness *
I have spent the week before Canada Day in France, thinking about Canada. Nothing like a trip to France to make one think about Canada. [More]

The quest to rebrand the city *
Toronto has always been super at selling itself -- at least to Torontonians -- but out West, we don't call it "Tee-Zero" for nothing. The push is on to sell T.O.'s identity: but first it has to be found, JOHN BARBER writes. [More]

The smart money is on Trump's women *
Attention people of Bay Street and other business types operating outside the centre of the universe. There is money to be made. [More]

Toronto plans crackdown on blue-box scavengers *
Bloggers uniformly denounce Toronto's latest tax-grab, calling it an opportunity to punish the poor, off-the-radar street-pioneers and resourceful crafters, alike. [More]

Toronto's 19th nervous breakdown *
While Toronto was desperately trying to stage something other than a world-class epidemic the other night, Vancouver was enjoying its own world-class event... [More]

Toronto's PR is tops. . . *
. . .at hyping Toronto (or as we like to call it, "Tee-Zero"). And a propos of looking at the city "from the outside in" (as they claim to have done) we wonder if they talked to anyone who DOESN'T live in Toronto to determine why they hate it so much! (Just asking.) [More]

Toronto's rough cuts *
SARS, a stronger dollar and uncertainty over government funding are causing havoc in the $3-billion film-and-TV industry of Canada's largest city, GAYLE MacDONALD writes (though some Canadian cities are faring better). [More]

Toronto, the centre of the universe? Kudos, brickbats *
We have CNN covering the fact that there has been major looting going on in Ottawa, so I go to The Globe and Mail to get more info... [More]

Vancouver win means Toronto's out of luck *
The joy in Vancouver at being awarded the 2010 Winter Games has a dark flip side -- the gloom it holds for Toronto, a city that once had high Olympic hopes but now has almost no chance of being selected as host of the 2012 Summer Games. [More]

Winter finally arrives in Eastern Canada *
Amusingly enough, Canada's so-called "National newspaper" does not seem to have noticed that it has been winter in Western Canada since November. As always in the national media -- it's all about Toronto, n'est-ce pas? [More]

Secondary Sites:
'Toronto is back and it's booming:' Jagger *
A crush of 450,000 people -- thousands more than the population of Halifax -- descended on the grounds of an abandoned military base Wednesday to write history as images of the biggest concert staged in Canada were broadcast around the world in a public declaration that Toronto's SARS outbreak is over. [More]

A present-free Christmas? Bah humbug *
Editor's note: One wonders if Leah McLaren has any idea how consistently offensive her comments are...? Ah, well, here she goes again. [More]

An MRI diversion? *
Imagine it: Ladies and gentlemen, we have some deletions from the Toronto Maple Leafs lineup. In for Mats Sundin, Joe Slobotnik. Playing for Alexander Mogilny, Ed Schmidlap. Sundin and Mogilny are expected to miss the next two years, with unidentified knee injuries. [More]

Arts programs suffer as business gets funds *
The humanities and social science programs at Ontario universities are losing funding dollars to their counterparts in engineering and business as private companies gain more influence on where new money is directed, a new study shows. [More]

Can the canapés, we want local films *
Forget Cannes. Forget Toronto. Let us now praise not-so-famous film festivals. Let's celebrate the smaller, regional festivals that crop up because audiences subjected to a steady diet of blockbusters want to see movies that reflect their own experience. Those low-budget festivals happen in small cities because emerging filmmakers are desperate for an audience. [More]

City makes best of dark situation *
Despite gridlock, jammed elevators and line-ups for phone booths, hot dogs, most stay in good humour [More]

Conan rules Canada this week *
They must be saving the maple syrup for later in the week because the first Toronto taping of Late Night with Conan O'Brien on Tuesday night left no other Canadian cliché unclobbered. [More]

Deal for charity match could be done by today *
The proposed golf event to boost Toronto in the wake of SARS is inching closer toward reality. [More]

Earth to Frisco: Hendeles beat you by 13 years *
Hype is as American as violence and cherry pie, if one may paraphrase H. Rap Brown's most famous apothegm. Which perhaps explains why an exhibition of 200 photographs by Diane Arbus set to open in San Francisco next month is already being freighted with descriptives like "the most significant Arbus show in more than 30 years," and "the first utterly authoritative retrospective done with the co-operation of her family." [More]

Fighting the SARS effect? Try a Woodstock *
Ontario's Ministry of Tourism is betting $5.2-million that some of the biggest names in Canadian rock music can dispel the SARS-seeded clouds of gloom hovering over Toronto. [More]

Golf charity match comes undone *
The Rolling Stones have left and Tiger Woods won't be coming. [More]

Golf event needs government go-ahead *
The star-powered golf event featuring Tiger Woods aimed at boosting Toronto's tourism and hospitality industry in the wake of SARS is a go, at least according to Canada's largest restaurateur. [More]

Hey fans, there's no reason for Leafs to change *
The new general manager of the Toronto Maple Leafs has been in place for two weeks now and promises to improve the roster have been duly made -- albeit with little action so far -- and still the impotent rage of the fans pours from sports-talk radio. [More]

Hurricane a 'pussy cat' by the time it hit Ontario *
Trees and branches were blown down across the province, more than 40,000 people lost their power, but still hurricane Isabel left most in Ontario feeling somewhat disappointed. [More]

In hospital, SARS battle still not over *
Part of the money raised by rock concert will benefit health-care workers in area [More]

Kanata Trade Mission to get Toronto content *
Tourism Toronto continues its efforts to drive travel to the city with its participation in the annual KANATA travel promotion event, taking place this week in Japan. [More]

Leafs Fall: SENATORS 7, MAPLE LEAFS 1 *
Ottawa scores five in the first period en route to win over short-handed Toronto squad. [More]

Leafs must forget humiliation by Senators, and fast *
Their Senators playing the Toronto Maple Leafs and toying with them, humiliating them, playing with a confidence bordering on arrogance, and being full measure for it. Pretty tick-tack-toe goals going in one after another, all at the same end of the rink, while the Leafs' fans, in their own building, so smug and rich and satisfied, grow quieter by the moment. [More]

Learning to love Toronto *
Funny, but The Toronto Song -- a decade-old ditty by the Edmonton comedy troupe Three Dead Trolls in a Baggie -- doesn't seem quite so catchy these days. [More]

Let's keep Conan's T.O. visit in perspective, people *
Did everybody around here take a giddy pill? It's either the giddy pills or we really are rubes. In the presence of American celebrities -- even B-list ones -- we can be just so gauche. If the celebrity pays attention to Canada, we prattle with delight and fawn over them. [More]

Life without spring's dalliances *
A neighbour of mine passed by the other day as I was shovelling the smog away from our front walk. We live not very far from Queen's Park and the clouds of toxic fumes that are produced by the army of leaf-blowers and gas-powered lawn mowers, and the idling tour buses by which our provincial government advertises its environmental and energy policies to anyone reckless enough to be out-of-doors during a smog alert, tend to settle in pretty heavily during the summer months. Fortunately, when the air gets really thick -- as it did the other day -- I can shove the condensed poison that falls from the sky into a dozen or so plastic garbage bags and ship everything off to Michigan. You'd think that several million years of evolution might have produced a more sophisticated waste-disposal program, but this is Toronto. We're a patient bunch. (Go Leafs, go.) Things take time. [More]

Maple Leafs could play at SkyDome *
Team officials studying the idea (jealous much?) [More]

New Yoga position: Flex that pocketbook *
Yoga-mania has Toronto in its profitable grip. But should spirituality be accessorized? [More]

Non-fiction sweeps Trillium awards *
It's a fact: Non-fiction is finally triumphing over its traditionally sexier cousin, fiction, evident yesterday when non-fiction books swept the Trillium Book Awards, Ontario's pre-eminent literary honours. [More]

Not many tourists escape criticism -- even Canadians *
Most countries have had their tourists cast in unpleasant, often unfair stereotypes. Americans have been called loud and uncultured; Britain and Australia have been criticized for exporting lager louts; and Chinese are accused of being ill-mannered. Even Canadians have been cast as rude cheapskates. [More]

Party claim refuted after probe *
An investigation by the National Hockey League's security staff yesterday cleared players on the Toronto Maple Leafs of any wrongdoing after several lurid allegations about the behaviour of two players at a team party were made in a national Swedish newspaper. [More]

Planning for golf exhibition bogs down *
After a series of conference calls and meetings, a proposed golf event featuring Tiger Woods that would benefit Toronto in the wake of SARS has settled into a stalemate. [More]

Police brace for Mickstock *
There are many rules for the fans on day Stones will create their own city [More]

Quotable Conan *
Some one-liners from Conan O'Brien's first monologue Tuesday night... [More]

Rolling Stones? I'm not writing about them *
I felt that it might be a good idea for me to write a column about something other than the Rolling Stones this week. That's because, as I sit here, I can already feel the rumble of media hype increasing in volume to what will no doubt become a deafening roar by the day after tomorrow. [More]

SARS panel recommends independent health-care agency *
Ontario should establish an independent health-protection agency and free the chief medical officer from any potential political interference, a panel of medical experts charged with identifying the key lessons learned from SARS said yesterday. [More]

SARS plan enlists Woods *
Is Tiger Woods coming to Toronto for a star-studded golf exhibition to benefit the city's SARS-ravaged tourism industry? [More]

SARS: WHO warning unhealthy for Air Canada, CEO says *
Air Canada's revenue is under "tremendous additional strain" because of the World Health Organization advisory that customers avoid travel to Toronto, president and chief executive officer Robert Milton told employees. [More]

Schedule some sympathy for these devils *
Barring a last-minute strike by Local 43 of the Rock Concert Tarpaulin and Folding-Chair Workers Union, here are the final regulations and schedule for the July 30 Rolling Stones "Liver Spots '03" concert in Toronto. [More]

Sotheby's is king of the castle once again *
The auctioneer's comeback flows from a decision by its New York parent to bring two high-profile Canadians into its Toronto office. [More]

Stars and SARS: the fallout continues *
Toronto is a safe place to visit, the World Health Organization decided last week, but some celebrities, it seems, haven't heard the word. Moreover, the SARS panic appears to be confusing their knowledge of geography. [More]

Stones/Sars concert: Excited, for openers *
Blue Rodeo, Sass Jordan, the Guess Who all giddy at the prospect of playing with the Stones, GUY DIXON writes [More]

Sundin deserves most of the credit for Toronto's turnaround *
Well, well, so much for the "expert" predictions for this National Hockey League season when it comes to the Toronto Maple Leafs... [More]

Taming the automobile in Montreal's core *
City cordons off 10 downtown blocks in symbolic attempt to combat pollution [More]

The (your name) Festival Hall *
If you have a spare $30-million -- and preferably more -- then the Toronto International Film Festival wants to speak with you. [More]

THE GAME -- August 26, 2003 *
the time John Ferguson Jr. makes his mark as the general manger of the Toronto Maple Leafs, Pat Quinn will be long gone, Ed Belfour and Gary Roberts too, and probably Owen Nolan. Tie Domi will have turned to more genteel pursuits. Mats Sundin, if he's still in town, will be one of the game's elder statesmen, and who knows in what form the business of big-league professional hockey might find itself. [More]

The shows go on, with fingers crossed *
The stage of The Lion King in Toronto will continue to be lit in a bright African gold, unaffected by any worries over a reoccurring blackout, in what seems to be a cross-your-fingers, go-ahead attitude running throughout Toronto's entertainment sector. [More]

The stunted logic that comes from a diet of cream pies and a million pounds of beef *
Some desk-clearing before taking a little-deserved break: Notice how this has become the Summer of Stunts. [More]

TIFF: A solid year, with few stinkers *
As they stagger to The End, our screen team selects some favourite movies and moments, and captures the mood of the film-fest marathon [More]

TIFF: Ink-stained airheads asking wretched questions *
What is to be done about the alleged press conferences during the Toronto International Film Festival? They should be a golden opportunity -- rows of glittering cast members from the hottest movies provide salient quotes to a lot of reporters who can't get one-on-one interview time. [More]

Time simply stood still when lights went out *
Like an eerie motif from a science fiction movie, the historic clock at Toronto's Union Station stopped dead the minute the lights went out. The time: 16:13 -- and the train station's clock stayed at that time for hours and hours after the power failed. [More]

Toronto emergency plan is triggered by Lastman *
An unprecedented power outage paralyzed much of Ontario, New York and parts of the northeastern United States yesterday, stranding millions of commuters as airports shut down, offices emptied and elevators, subways and streetcars ground to a halt. [More]

Toronto's Fashionista secrets *
"Great sunglasses," said the woman behind the counter at my neighbourhood French patisserie. It was a recent Saturday morning and I was wearing my new shades. [More]

Treasuring our complaints and questioning our values: It's what makes us Canadian *
We most assuredly are, as the Prime Minister said on Parliament Hill during the Canada Day celebrations, "a people like no other." [More]

Vancouver's street smarts *
Toronto could use some lessons in city planning, LISA ROCHON writes, and it need look no farther than the West Coast for a model of urbanism [More]

Walking around a powerless city *
The first odd thing I noticed was that the traffic light was out at Adelaide and Bathurst, an obscure enough intersection in downtown Toronto. I was waiting to go to a play, and had an hour to kill. It was 20 past 4 on Thursday afternoon, hot and bright. [More]

Wente: Mick Saves Toronto *
Okay, so I didn't go. I'm sorry if that makes me a bad person. I want to show the world Toronto is walking tall again. But the thought of walking for hours through the blazing heat, lining up for the subway, being frisked for contraband by the security police, lining up for water, paying $6 for a hot dog, lining up for porta-potties, and sitting all day in the baking sun so that I could get a close-up look at Mick's big lips on a giant video screen was strangely unappealing. [More]

Worldwide exposure for Toronto golf event *
Exhibition with Woods, Weir, Sorenstam, Kane could draw 250 million viewers [More]